I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream for . . . Brussels Sprouts! "Screaming Heads": A Recipe for a Brussels Sprouts Gratin

Brussels sprouts must be like cilantro: People either love ‘em or hate ‘em. Me? I was somewhere in between until I started cooking them myself. We had them at home often growing up, but they were in the frozen boxes and seemed a little mushy to me; maybe we just cooked them too long, or with too much water. A little bacon and butter easily cured that problem, though. (My sister loved the “baby cabbage heads,” but she also liked the canned LaChoy Chinese dinners we had back then, too, the only kind of Chinese food we had available to us in ancient times. After that experience, I was awestruck by what a real bean sprout looked – and tasted – like.)

But when I cooked fresh Brussels sprouts, I was hooked, too. They’re much more readily available these days and even though they’re billed as a “winter vegetable” you can get them year round. I snap them up every time I see them. They’re very easy to cook – steamed, microwaved, or roasted. They can be bitter, but if you trim them and cut an X through the bottom before cooking, you’ll reduce those chances.

And they’re very low in calories -- under 10 per head – high in fiber and all kinds of other good things. I did try growing them last year in my own vegetable garden and they were very good – just didn’t really yield enough to make it worthwhile to repeat. Best just to buy at Davey’s Fruit & Vegetable stand.

But they’re not a very healthy food in this recipe. If there was a Richter scale for rich, creamy, cheesy dishes, this would shake you off the charts. It almost, but not quite, covers the unique flavor and texture of the sprouts. Aside from roasting* this is my favorite way to prepare Brussels sprouts. Reserved for special, indulgent occasions only!

Ready for the calorie truck?

Screaming Heads: Brussels Sprouts Gratin

Adapted from The Cookworks, 2003

2 pounds Brussels sprouts

4 ounces prosciutto, julienned

2 T unsalted butter

1 recipe, Roasted Garlic**

3 T all purpose flour

 ½ C heavy cream

1 C half-and-half

¼ cup sherry

1 C finely grated Parmesan, plus ½ cup

1 t freshly grated nutmeg

1 t kosher salt

½ t freshly grated black pepper

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Prepare Brussels sprouts: Trim the stem to make it flush. Quarter each sprout and score the stem on each quarter with a ¼ inch deep “X.”

Score the prosciutto in the butter and stir continuously for about 2 minutes. Add the garlic and Brussels sprouts and continue stirring 2 minutes. Add the cream, half-and-half and the sherry. Bring the liquid to a simmer, then reduce the heat and continue simmering for 7 minutes or until the liquid is reduced by 1/3. Stir in 1 cup of the Parmesan, nutmeg, salt and pepper. Transfer to an ovenproof casserole and cover with remaining Parmesan cheese. Cover and bake for about 25 minutes.

Roasted Garlic

1 garlic head

½ teaspoon olive oil

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Cut of papery tip of the head, exposing top of each garlic clove. Brush the exposed garlic with olive oil.  Place the garlic, root side down on a piece of foil. Bundle the garlic with the foil, leaving a small vent o top. Roast the garlic for 45 minutes or until the cloves turn beige and are fork tender. Remove from the oven and let stand until cool enough to handle.  Squeeze the garlic head upside down over a small bowl and the cloves will pop out. Will keep refrigerated for up to 1 week.

* I bet that the recipe would be definitely simpler and at least as tasty – if not better – if you roasted the Brussels sprouts – as pictured above -- separately, then made the sauce and then baked them together.

Money from Broccoli: Broccoli "Coins" & Walnut Salad

I really hate to waste food. If a recipe asks for a half of a pepper, I’m thinking immediately what I might do with the rest of the pepper. (Sometimes, it’s “Oh, just chop the whole thing and put it in.”) Same with onion. I know those things can always go in a frittata or a soup, and I often save broccoli stalks for just that very reason. But when I found a recipe that actually specified using the stalks and “save the florets for another use” I had to read on.

The recipe comes from the very first cookbook I ever bought for myself:  Glamour’s Gourmet on the Run, by Jane Kirby. I read the magazine all the time back then and  I read the cooking column before anything else. I loved that book, and still refer to it often. It’s stained and pages are falling out but it still has a place of honor on my bookshelf. I learned a lot from that book; still do. Mostly I learned that you don’t need to follow a recipe, once you get a few what-goes-with-what concepts down. And I learned that good cooking doesn’t necessarily need to take a lot of time; fresh ingredients, not exotic or fancy ones, and an understanding of herbs and spices and various cooking techniques are far more important. (But I still love to spend an afternoon in the kitchen fussing over food prep.)

The coin shapes are really pretty cool looking; kinda like looking at cloud shapes.  I'm sure they'd be just as good served warm as a side.  Below is the recipe from the book.   Here’s what I did differently (probably learned this from the book): I added strawberries, because I had them; I used gorgonzola, ditto; I used red romaine, because that’s what’s growing in my garden, and I just used balsamic vinegar as a dressing. Oh, and I used more that just 1/3 cup walnuts.  (And I forgot to add the cheese before I took the picture.) Now, what do I do with the florets?

Broccoli Coins &Walnut Salad

from Glamour’s Gourmet on the Run, by Jane Kirby
4 stalks broccoli
1 T butter or margarine
1/3 C coarsely chopped walnuts
1 head red leaf lettuce
1/3 C crumbled bleu cheese
Oil & vinegar dressing

With a sharp knife, cut buds from broccoli; reserve for another use. Slice stalks into ¼ in “coins.” Steam for 5 to 7 minutes or until just tender. Drain and run under cold water until cool.

Heat butter in skillet. Add walnuts and sauté 2 to 3 minutes; drain. Clean lettuce and tear into bite-sized pieces. Add to salad bowl with broccoli and walnuts. Sprinkle with bleu cheese. Add dressing; toss and serve. Makes 4 servings.

Here’s to Substitutes: Teachers and Green Beans

“Hey, it’s Mrs. Wolbert today! Mrs. Wolbert, you’re my favorite sub.”

“I’m a teacher, Caleb, not a sandwich. And the only reason I’m your favorite is because you think I’m nice, right?”

Caleb looked a little sheepish at that. He knew I was right. As a substitute teacher, I learned that I’ll have much easier days being nice and tolerant that being a toughie. (That advice doesn’t go for regular teachers, however; they need to be tough.)  But substitute teachers hoe a different garden. How many times have I heard that I’m “just a sub”? Or seen eyes – from both teachers and students – pass over me like I was invisible. “Subs” are just place-holders. We’re standing in for the real thing.

It’s ironic that I find myself substitute teaching high school English now and again. I got my teaching certificate when I graduated college, even though I didn’t really want to teach at the time. My mother encouraged me that even though I had different aspirations I should to take advantage of the opportunity while I had it because “You never know, honey. You just might need something to fall back on.” I did teach for a couple years after graduation, but I eventually got a job doing what I really wanted – writing. But after twenty-five years of writing employee newsletters, annual reports, sales literature, executive speeches and the like -- not to mention the company’s downsizing and merger – I’m enjoying the semi-retired life with my husband on a 150 acre farm and answering the 5 a.m. phone call to teach a day or two occasionally and doing some freelance writing.

And even though it’s not exactly something I was forced to “fall back on,” as my mother suggested, teaching, even substitute teaching, provides me a very pleasant way to keep my hand in, talk with intelligent people (yeah, the kids, too) and make a little, very little, extra cash, “pin money,” as they used to say. Some days, the kids are a real handful, ready to take full advantage of the sub. But if I’m firm at the start, keep order, and get the kids focused on task, then we can afford to spend the end of the class period doing something fun and I can be the “nice” Mrs. Wolbert, sub. And occasionally I get to really teach . . . and that’s fun. Sharing your enthusiasm for a subject and seeing in students’ faces that they’re “getting” it is sheer joy.

Which brings me to cooking. (Nice segue, eh? Joy. Cooking. Get it?) From time to time, we either have to or want to substitute an ingredient. Pasta for rice. Dried herbs for fresh. Bacon for prosciutto. Well, after seeing the diet success of a friend on the Atkins diet, my husband and I decided to cut back on carbs. We started using tortillas to make wraps instead of bread for sandwiches, practically ruled our potatoes (which I really miss) and just generally cut back on pasta and all things carb. When I found exotic (exotic for these parts, anyhow) mushrooms on sale at our local supermarket, I had to try them. But the recipe I chose, a wild mushroom ragout, called for using angel hair as a bed for the ragout. So, I subbed green beans! It sure made the plate nice and colorful. The ragout? It was good, but probably not something I’ll make again. The tomatoes and herbs seemed too rich for the mild mushrooms, overwhelming them. I imagine the mushrooms would have been better with a more delicate butter, wine, lemon, garlic sauce – and over angel hair! But it was still a good experiment. In the picture, you’ll see we also had chicken, simple pieces of white meat, egged and rolled in breadcrumbs and Parmesan.

P.S. If you know anyone who’d like to share their experiences (or your own!) about substitute teaching for an article I’m writing, I’d love to hear from you –rdwolbert at gmail dot com

Wild Mushroom Ragout
From Low-Fat Lifestyle Forum

• 2 T olive oil
• 1 small onion, chopped

• 3 cloves garlic, minced

• 1 1/2 lb fresh wild mushrooms, trimmed and sliced

• 1/4 c chicken stock

• 3/4 c dry red wine

• 2 T tomato paste

• 3 T Italian parsley, chopped

• 2 t fresh sage, chopped

• 1 t fresh rosemary, chopped

• 1 t fresh marjoram, chopped

• 1/2 t salt

• 1/4 t freshly ground black pepper

• 1 lb angel hair pasta

• ¼ C grated Parmesan cheese

For mushrooms, try cremini, portobello, chanterelle, oyster or shitake. (I used cremini, oyster & shitake.) Heat oil in large nonstick frying pan over medium low heat. Add onion and cook until tender (5 minutes). Add garlic and cook another minute. Add mushrooms, stock, wine, tomato paste, parsley, sage, rosemary, marjoram, salt and pepper. Bring to simmer, cover and cook until mushrooms are tender (about 20 minutes). Remove cover and reduce sauce if necessary. Cook pasta until al dente. Drain and return to pot. Add sauce and toss well. Serve immediately topped with cheese. Serves 6. Calories: 161, Fat: 8 grams per serving. 

Pasta Salad 101: Curing the Ubiquitous and the Bland

I don’t know if it’s just because I’m Italian-looking or because my cooking is that good, but I’m often asked to contribute a pasta salad to potluck summer parties. Now that the season has really kicked in, I’m preparing for the onslaught. But I don’t want to do same ol’, same ol’.

They’re everywhere and usually pretty bland, even my own, I must say. So after poring through hundreds (maybe just dozens) of recipes, I landed on an article from Pam Anderson (the cook, not the other one!) that was exactly what I was looking for. It’s a “how-to” rather than a prescriptive recipe. Her tips and hints are explained very well and provide as much inspiration as a pretty picture. I do enjoy understanding the reason we do some of the things we do, rather than just doing them because someone (even if it was my grandmother) said that was the way to do it.

I believe the first time I ever had a pasta salad was about 25 years ago at a Memorial Day party. The pasta was spaghetti and it was reddish in color and everyone was eating it up. The cook who brought it easily rattled off the recipe: a pound of spaghetti, a bottle of Italian salad dressing, a package of dry spaghetti sauce mix, pepperoni, and green pepper. That was it. Maybe black olives. An effortless hit. And perfectly satisfactory, I guess, but not for me. I much prefer fresh ingredients and just a bit of fuss. Easy is okay, but, for me, part of the joy of cooking for others is to show the people I’m with that “I like you guys and I want to make a fuss over you and this is the best way I know how.”

Here’s an abridged version of Pam Anderson’s “Five Steps to a Perfect Pasta Salad”:

Step One. Prepare 1 pound of pasta, bite size shapes (so much for that spaghetti salad of yore!) like farfalle, fusilli, penne, ziti, small shells. Cook in a gallon of boiling water and add 2 tablespoons of salt just until tender. Drain but don’t rinse the pasta. Instead dump onto a rimmed cookie sheet to cool and dry. Don’t worry if the pasta sticks together. The dressing will break it up.

Step Two. Prepare two pounds of key ingredients, the salad’s major add-ins: cooked and raw vegetables, poultry, seafood, canned beans, mild cheeses, cooked or raw vegetables, etc. Choose at least three major flavorings. Let one key ingredient take the lead: 1 pound of asparagus with 8 ounces each of sliced mushrooms and cherry tomatoes, for a total of two pounds.

Options for cooked vegetables

• Asparagus
• Broccoli or cauliflower
• Carrots
• Green beans
• Snow peas or sugar snap peas
• Zucchini

Options for no-fuss vegetables

• Canned artichoke hearts
• Bean sprouts
• Celery
• Mushrooms
• Cucumbers
• Fennel
• Avocado
• Zucchini
• Cherry tomatoes
• Bell peppers
• Tomatoes
• Frozen green peas, thawed

Step Three. Add the intense flavors. Add about a ½ cup of one of the following options, but feel free to add 2 or 3 – roasted peppers, feta cheese and pine nuts will give a Mediterranean feel.


Capers, drained (1/4 cup)
Parmesan, shaved with a vegetable
Feta, crumbled
Olives, pitted and coarsely chopped
Peperoncini, drained & thinly sliced
Sun-dried tomatoes packed in oil, cut into small dice
Bacon, fried and crumbled (8 ounces)
Prosciutto (8 ounces) thinly sliced cut into small dice
Smoked salmon (8 ounces) thinly sliced then cut into thin strips
Toasted nuts – pine nuts, cashews, peanuts
Toasted sesame seeds or sunflower seeds

Step Four. Add onions and herbs. No matter what else is in your pasta salad, always add three large green onions, sliced, or half a small red onion, diced. Then mince 3 tablespoons fresh herbs and/or grate 2 teaspoons orange or lemon zest.

Step Five. Make a dressing. You’ll need one cup to coat the salad. Make sure the dressing is thick and emulsified; otherwise, the pasta absorbs the vinegar and the oil clings to the pasta’s surface. Stick with milder rice vinegar or lemon juice for the acid. Although balsamic vinegar is flavorful, it tends to turn a salad and unattractive beige.

And the best tip of all:  Don’t dress and toss the salad until about 15 minutes before serving.

I made a pasta salad for a family get together a few weeks ago following Pam’s tips and it really made a big difference. (Attention to detail usually does, doesn’t it?) I made shrimp the main ingredient, mushrooms and broccoli combined for the second pound, then red peppers and feta for add-ins.  Fresh herbs were just a modest parsley, but fresh makes a big difference.  My nephew with the discriminating taste pronounced it “The best ever!”

Here’s a favorite dressing for pasta salads:

Creamy Vinaigrette

¼ cup rice wine vinegar
2 tablespoons mayonnaise
1 large clove garlic, minced
salt and freshly ground black pepper
2/3 cup olive oil

Measure vinegar and mayonnaise into a 2 cup measure. With small whisk, stir in garlic, and big pinch of salt and a few grinds of pepper. Measure oil in another cup. Slowly whisk oil into mixture, first in droplets, then in a slow steady stream to make an emulsified vinaigrette.  (Actually, I prefer to make my dressings in the food processor to make sure they emulsify well.  Then I'll just give a good shake again before using.)

Baby, It's (Still) Cold Outside!

It’s been unseasonably cool here this early May. I had to dig out the gloves I’d put away for the summer. I thought I was being organized and efficient; now I have upset boxes. I had to cover my newly planted vegetable garden and drape sheets over the last of the lilacs, just to savor a few more days of fragrance.

But that’s okay. The cool weather gives me another good reason to cook cozy comfort food, one of my favorite pasta dishes, one I never make in the summer. My sausage-pepper fettuccini is a simple, quick, mildly-spiced, creamy-saucy dish that ranks right up there with pasta carbonerra for me. That it happens to be my husband’s favorite just gives me another great excuse to make it. Forget about the fact that we’re both trying to shed a few pounds before an upcoming vacation. Who can think about shorts and tanks when it’s 35 degrees outside?

So while we start a fire to burn the last of the indoor firewood, I start to warm up the kitchen with a pot of boiling water and set about chopping the veggies, with Siriusly Sinatra crooning in the background. A bottle of wine is definitely in order.  This is a very colorful and, of course, rich pasta dish.  (I had only spaghetti in the pantry that day; better with fettucini.)

Mangia! Buon appetito!


Sausage-Pepper Fettuccini

½ pound sweet Italian sausage
½ cup butter
1 cup green pepper, cut into medium sized squares
1 cup red pepper, cut into medium sized squares
1 small onion, sliced thinly
1/2 teaspoon dried basil
½ teaspoon dried oregano
½ teaspoon dried thyme (or use all fresh, if you can!) 
1 clove (or more!) garlic, minced
1 cup half-and-half
12 oz. fettuccini noodles, cooked and drained
½ cup (or more!) grated parmesan – the real stuff

Remove casing from sausage, if necessary, and break into small pieces. In large skillet over medium heat, cook sausage until done. Remove from skillet. In same skillet, over medium high heat, melt the butter and add the pepper, onion, garlic and seasonings. Cook 3-5 minutes, keeping the vegetables crisp tender. Stir in sausage and half-and-half and cook until heated through. Toss with hot fettuccine and mix in cheese. Makes 4 to 6 servings. (Leftovers make a great frittata.)

A Gift of Tahini

A very heavy box came in the mail a couple days before my birthday. It was from my daughter in Florida. To send this heavy box to Pennsylvania cost her, I knew. That it was early was, well, not typical. But the real surprise was what was inside.

She’d made a little game of this package. She put instructions inside the box that told me to be sure and open the little packages in their numbered order. Each wrapped package had a number and a little note. There were nine.

First there was hoisin sauce: “Can’t pronounce it, but I know you like it.” Then some plum sauce, duck sauce, and a can of sardines, one of anchovies. The label on the sardines said, “These are just weird, so they had your name on them.” Then there were bean threads, cellophane noodles and arborio rice. The piece de resistance, the last but not least was tahini: “Just what you always wanted, Mom! Happy birthday!”

You see, as much as I enjoy our country life, from time to time, I get a little frustrated at not being able to find some ingredients I want at our local grocery stores, at least when I want, or when making something like hummus, for instance, is on my mind. And I don’t think far ahead enough to order things online or when I’m in the city (which is rare, by the way.) So when Amy asked me what I wanted for my birthday, I told her I wanted her to get me some of those kinds of things to stock my pantry.

I’d really forgotten about telling her that until the package came. I called her right away and she told me what a ball she had shopping in a grocery store for my birthday present. She’s out of her element, buying this kind of stuff, so she had a friend along to guide her on this foreign mission, thank heaven.

Because I couldn’t be with my distant daughter yesterday, Mother’s Day, I decided I would make my hummus with the tahini she gave me a few months ago – just a little way to feel closer to her. And even though mothers aren’t supposed to be cooking on Mother’s Day, I decided this wasn’t really cooking – I was just indulging my hobby.

I set about making the hummus. It was a semi-spontaneous decision. A couple days before, I bought dried chickpeas at the store. I had soaked them the day before and then, on a whim, decided I would try roasting them instead of boiling them. It was like eating nuts!

I wasn’t sure if the roasted beans would be the same as canned as I made the hummus, since none of the recipes I looked at suggested roasting first. But the hummus was just great; it may have taken a little longer to puree in the food processor than canned beans would take, but it worked fine and did indeed imbue a nice, nutty flavor to the hummus.

So thanks again for the birthday present, Amy! It helped to make a nice Mother’s Day, too!


Roasted Red Pepper Hummus
1 cup chickpeas, or garbanzo beans
2 large cloves garlic
4 T lemon juice
4 T tahini paste
2 T olive oil
Water, as needed
½ t salt
¼ t black pepper
1 t cumin
Shake (or two) of crushed red pepper
Several drops sriracha sauce
2- 3 pieces large pieces of roasted red pepper, from jar

Place chickpeas, garlic cloves, lemon juice, tahini and olive oil in food processor bowl. Mix until well-blended, about five minutes, adding water as needed to make texture as creamy as desired. Add seasonings. Roughly chop red pepper, add to mixture and pulse a few times, leaving some red chunks of pepper visible. Refrigerate several hours before serving to allow flavors to meld. (Ideally served with homemade pita chips!)

PBJ and Beer

Last weekend, we went to a beer tasting party hosted by a young couple who don’t live too far from us. It was their Third Annual Beer Fest and they’re making it a “first Saturday in May” tradition, just like the Kentucky Derby. The host and a friend got into making “home brew” a few years ago, and they’ve gotten pretty good at it! They tapped six or seven of their own kegs.

They named them all -- typically, I can’t remember a one of them – and they posted descriptions of each variety and what made them unique. I didn’t sample all of them; in this case, I don’t really think variety is the spice of life. I sampled an oatmeal stout and a honey beer, but my favorite was what they said was the “hoppiest.”

It’s a potluck party and I always see this as an opportunity to try something new. My husband thinks I should stick with tried and true faves. So my compromise was a twist on something everyone loves: peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. I made Peanut Butter and Jelly Cookie bars.

I decided on this a couple days before the party when I happened to catch Ina Garten, aka The Barefoot Contessa, on the Food Network. I don’t watch cooking shows nearly as often as I’d like and I haven’t yet cultivated the good habit of setting the DVR to a couple favorites. And the only reason I was watching TV at all in the middle of the day was because I was catching up on my least favorite domestic duty – ironing. And The Barefoot Contessa was providing me company while I wrestled with wrinkles.

Truth is, I didn’t really like Ina Garten’s show when I first saw it. Could have been something as silly as I didn’t like the intro music. But I really like the show now and I love Ina’s style. She’s pretty low key, loves to use fresh ingredients, often combined in new ways and she’s a great teacher. An experienced cook won’t be offended by her instruction, which she often delivers as an off-handed hint, and the novice can learn an awful lot.

And Peanut Butter and Jelly Bars were on the menu that day. I stopped ironing (what a relief!)and paid attention. I made the cookies the morning of the party, sampled one, decided they were pretty good and took them as my contribution. They didn’t move at first, which had me worried, but then they disappeared. Someone found out that I had brought them and then I got compliments. And that’s the main reason we cook, right? Just to make something good that people like.

Peanut Butter and Jelly BarsFrom Ina Garten

1/2 pound (2 sticks) unsalted butter, at room temperature
1 1/2 cups sugar
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
2 extra-large eggs, at room temperature
2 cups (18 ounces) creamy peanut butter (recommended: Skippy)
3 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 1/2 teaspoons kosher salt
1 1/2 cups (18 ounces) raspberry jam or other jam
2/3 cups salted peanuts, coarsely chopped

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.

Grease a 9 by 13 by 2-inch cake pan. Line it with parchment paper, then grease and flour the pan.

In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, cream the butter and sugar on medium speed until light yellow, about 2 minutes. With the mixer on low speed, add the vanilla, eggs, and peanut butter and mix until all ingredients are combined.

In a small bowl, sift together the flour, baking powder, and salt. With the mixer on low speed, slowly add the flour mixture to the peanut butter mixture. Mix just until combined.

Spread 2/3 of the dough into the prepared cake pan and spread over the bottom with a knife or offset spatula. Spread the jam evenly over the dough. Drop small globs of the remaining dough evenly over the jam. Don't worry if all the jam isn't covered; it will spread in the oven.

Sprinkle with chopped peanuts and bake for 45 minutes, until golden brown. Cool and cut into squares.